01Lonely in the city where everyone is from somewhere else
Berlin should be the easiest city in the world to belong in. Nobody is really from here; the person next to you at the späti moved from Madrid, São Paulo or Manchester too. And yet the loneliness in this city has its own particular flavour: a place built on reinvention attracts people who are between things, between careers, between relationships, between versions of themselves, and a city of people in transit is warm to meet and hard to hold on to. Friendships burn bright for a season and dissolve when the visa ends, the project ends, or the winter wins.
Add the famous Berlin winter, months of grey that arrive just as your social scaffolding thins, and it is no mystery that so many expats here describe feeling simultaneously free and unmoored.
02The English bubble and the German wall
You can work, date and socialise in Berlin entirely in English, and then the Anmeldung letter arrives, or the Krankenkasse form, or the landlord dispute, and suddenly you are a child again, dependent on a colleague’s translation for decisions that shape your life. Living between an English bubble and a German officialdom is its own quiet stressor: competent all day, helpless at the letterbox.
If you are looking for private online support in English, you can ask me about current availability. We begin with a free 15 to 20 minute consultation to discuss what you need, whether online work is suitable and which appointment times are available. Starting dates depend on that conversation and my capacity.
03Love in a city that prizes freedom
Berlin gives relationships room to be anything, and that freedom cuts both ways. Some of my clients here are trying to hold a committed relationship in a culture of open doors, wondering whether their wish for something settled makes them boring or just honest. Others moved here for a partner and found themselves inside that partner’s scene, their friends, their neighbourhood, their language, with no ground of their own. And couples who arrived together often discover the city stretches them in different directions: one thrives on the openness, the other quietly grieves the life they left.
I work with individuals and couples in all of these positions, online, in English. The work is not to decide what a relationship in Berlin should look like. It is to help you decide what yours needs to look like, and to say it to each other without the fight.
04When the move strains your relationship
A move to Germany often falls unevenly on a couple, one settled by work, the other isolated by admin and language. The relationship can become your only familiar ground here. I work with this directly, see relationship crisis abroad and trailing partner support.
05Why online
I am UK-based and work online in English. Before we begin, I check your location, suitability and available appointment times. If you move countries, we review whether continuing is possible before your next appointment. Read about therapy across borders. Individual sessions cost £70 for 50 minutes; couples sessions cost £100 for 70 minutes. See fees and how to begin.
06How I work
We begin where it hurts and make sense of it together, integrative and relational, drawing on attachment, parts work and trauma-informed therapy. If you are unsure online therapy across borders fits, I assess it openly first: suitability.
